“Assignment (length 2 weeks): Make a note of all the times you expect some kind of recognition or thanks for doing something for someone else.
Now note whenever somone does something for you or something that makes your life easier or more pleasant, no matter how small. Do you immediately offer recognition?“
(Due May 27th)
This assignment was easier for me to obey than most as my life is pretty small. Other than perhaps the rare public interaction at a store, I only interact with Suzanne on a daily basis, my neighbor and Goddess Voltairine occasionally.
I have a very humble nature (he bragged – humbly) and coupled with a low sense of self-worth, a devout Christian upbringing focused on self-sacrifice and service, I generally feel unworthy of recognition or thanks. Contrary to what you may think, I do not demand, expect nor ask for your recognition or thanks… in fact receiving it usually feels awkward and makes me uncomfortable. (The blush emjoi I often reply with is sincere!)
And as another devotee pointed out, an ‘expectation’ is largely based on past experience. If I pass you at work every morning and you say, “Top o’ the mornin’ to ya!” My expectation is that’s what you’ll say when we pass each other tomorrow. I have no expectation you’ll call me at home and say it, because you never do that.
You Goddess, have built the expectation to not expect recognition or thanks for anything I do for you, so I don’t. Do I sometimes want it? Sure. Who doesn’t love a ‘good boy’. But want and expect are two different things.
So in the course of 2 weeks, I don’t believe I expected any kind of recognition or thanks for doing something for someone else even once.
As to the second half of your assignment, I thank and acknowledge my wife constantly. It is a need of hers. If fact Words of Praise is her primary love language – especially coming from a male figure because she has classic, serious ‘daddy issues’ the need healing.
I’d like to think I’ve thanked and acknowledged you when you’ve given me gifts in the past and just for being in my life to provide a center for my need to provide service… ? But only you can answer that because communication only happens in the receiving.